No-carb is finally working - down 4 pounds today. Yeah!!!!

One of the hardest parts about losing weight to me is that when I finally decide to do it, it forces me to actually look at myself. Its so much easier to just close your eyes. Until the next time you have to look of course. I'm being really disgusted with myself right now. There really is no excuse for the way I am right now. Not fair to me or to Royce. This has to change. I know he loves me, but I'm ashamed to even go anywhere with him.

Thought I would give myself that 3 day period of getting used to the no carb thing - thats when it gets easier. Let myself eat as much as I wanted. Just to get into it. Now I will start restricting. I hate that word. I associate it with such failure.

I have one year before alumni. My 20 year reunion. Can you even believe that? I know I can do alot in a years time. And I know I will hate myself if I don't.

Oh, and its 30 compressions to 2 breaths. If anyone was wondering. Good to know.

178 today.