So I've started eating better and less - again. And I've lost a few pounds. I was 171 again today. Didn't gain any back. Haven't started working out yet, but I promised Royce I would when I got home. I think I should keep a food diary - again. So here goes.
(I don't want any shit from anyone, YES there were a couple of days I didn't eat much. Deal with it.)

Mon 7/2
Tamale 350 total

Tue 7/3
Bean burrito 350 total
from Taco Bell

Wed 7/4
Rice Bowl 430
Brownies 250
chicken 200
watermelon 100
------------------------
980 total

Thur 7/5
Turkey sub 560
Soup 275
salad and vegies 150
-------------------------
985 total

I totally feel guilty every time I eat. If I feel full at all I feel undisciplined and fat. And logically I know I have to eat, and that I am eating something good for me, but that full feeling always makes me feel shitty. When I'm not paying attention to my weight, and eating whatever I want I don't feel that way. Its only when I'm trying to lose and eat good. And I get obsessive with the scale. Every time I eat something, even if its very little, I feel like I'm going to hate myself for it because it will show up on the scale, either I will weigh more or I won't lose any more. I totally feel like I'm going to weigh 175 because I ate today.