I hate my period.
Woke up this morning, felt like shit warmed over. I just laid there - not unlike roadkill. Royce brought me some Tylenol, and I took it before I even attempted to get up. Today is the kids last day at school. Royce offered to take the kids to school because I felt so bad. He also went and got me breakfast at Jack in the Box even before he took the kids to school. So he comes back, walks in the door, I look at him and say "This must be attractive.......", as I'm sprawled out on the couch in my underwear and a shirt, propped up on pillows, comforter between my legs, hair up in a bun, with a giant soda resting in the corner of the couch, large curly fries leaning against a pillow with the Heinz bottle beside them, and my Jumbo Jack opened on the pillow in front of me - watching The Today Show.
I hate my period.
So I'm sitting there watching tv. Theres a story about a woman in Lake Havasu City who is having sextuplets. She's huge, hospitilized, looks like the little girl who turned into a blueberry on Willy Wonka, and is still smiling. The whole town had a baby shower for her. I start crying. Partly out of emotion, partly out of pity. The size of her stomach is giving me more cramps. I cry some more. How stupid is that? Royce leaves to go to the store, and to leave me in my crying foodfest. I double over a little more in pain and watch a story about women who have cancer that get wigs from donated hair. I start crying again, kind of sobbing this time. This has got to stop. I suddenly start feeling REALLY not so good, end up on the toilet with diarrea and start crying on the toilet in sheer frustration of doing this every month. Every month the same old thing. And every month, just a little bit worse. And then I see we have only 1/4 a roll of toilet paper left. Great. The pain is excruciating. Why hasn't the tylenol touched me? Oh, maybe because I need some REAL drugs. I go back to the living room. Angelina Jolie is giving an interview and talking about losing her mom. I think about my dad. I start crying again. If this keeps up I'm going to need an IV to rehydrate myself.
And we are supposed to go out today for Royce's birthday. Out to eat, to the stripclub. I hope I feel better. Why today. Honestly the only thing that ever makes me feel better is Jagermeister. Really. A shot of two. I always feel better after that, especially for cramps. Maybe I'll medicate with some Jager at the strip club.
I think I just need to have it yanked out. I'm never going to use my uterus again. Its retired. Put out to pasture on a nice little uteri farm. Maybe I just need to put it out of its misery. You know, it served me well, I used it alot, we have many fond memories. Slicing it in half to get Tyler. Expelling 4 babies. The little date we had in the ER with that cute doctor. But you know, all good things must come to an end. I think its time we both accepted that things really aren't working out between us anymore. Maybe now that I have insurance I'll just do it.
I hate my period.
I'm so sick of being sick.
Tylenol is kicking in a little bit.
I bet a pedicure would help my cramps.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
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8 Comments:
two words: MEDICAL MARIJUANA. Let me know. I miss you and love you!
dude, I don't know who wrote that but Nic completely agrees!!!
and I had a dental appt today and I discovered the joys of nitrous. I believe that we women should have it readily available every 20-30 days. :) remember me getting sick in 8th grade? yeah, I so completely feel your pain. miss you
n
Let me understand better.
Breakfast and getting to school is around 8am, and you're up with soda and curly fries? *crickets*
And you go to the strip club? I went once... I pitied the men there, eyes all aglow, with their money gripped tightly in their hands, waiting for some bored stripper to throw her legs over his shoulders... I didn't like it. I am glad Stormy thinks those places are pointless. *whew*
I'm pretty sure I know who wrote it, and I'm smiling. Yes, Stacey, curly fries in the morning. I know. And yes, I love strip clubs. I know, most women don't, but I do. We go alot. I can see where people think they are pointless, but some peoples point for going is different than others. They are pointless if you are trying to get laid. I love them, for lots of other reasons. And it was for Royce's birthday. We had a good time.
Stacey, yup most of the guys in most strip clubs a pathetic. Most dancers aren't even attracted to men. In fact many are kinda men haters. I like most other guys went when I was younger, I even bounced at one for a second job. I might just do it again while I'm in school. When I met Barb I had gone probably twice in 10 years, because after a short time of going there it seemed pointless to pay a girl to be half naked who was never going to do anything with me moreover probably didn't even like me. Much better to spend that money on a date with somebody who actually liked me, or hell just gas up the truck grab my rifle and go shooting for an afternoon.
When I met Barb she was going through a transformation from oppressed mommy/housewife/daughter to finding herself. We drove past a club one time and she wanted to know what they were like, simply because it was "naughty" and she had been told her whole life she couldn't go. I told her "The chicks are hot and in control and usually bitchy."
She said we didn't have to stay if we didn't like it. Cool.
Turns out it is a COMPLETELY different atmosphere when you go as a couple. First of all the girls who usually get shit from other women are being accepted by one. This makes them much nicer right off the bat. Then secondly they also figure out they don't have a deperate blathering idiot of a guy who is going to try to take them home. Instead it's kind of a kinky couples thing, Barb will often buy me dances ( by the way the dances are much better when a guy goes with his wife ). Barb is about as straight as a person can be, so it took me by surprise that she liks the clubs so much. But I figured it out.
First there is the fantasy/sexual/sensual/dark nature of the clubs that fits her personality. Then there is the fact that women are basically worshipped there. Next comes the music, wich moves her right to her core, she is as much as anything else a musical being. She herself being a "non-traditional" ( ink and not christian ) person is not judged there. Lastly and maybe most importantly she had spent most of her life being either physically and emotionally dominated by her mother or ex-hubby, and all of a sudden she finds a place where the women have all the power. And the men that she passes on the street and always has that little twinge of "is he safe? is he going to hurt me?" are just complete putty.
If I was single again ( God forbid, if he exists ) I wouldn't spend a dollar in a club. She has told me to go out by myself to them before and it just sucks, completely boring. However going with her is just a riot!!
Stacey that long ass post was me not Barbie.
I'm with you on hating the monthly! I BEGGED them to take my uterus OUT when my 4th baby was born by C-section, but all they would do was tie my tubes.
If you have insurance and they will cover it, I say GO FOR IT! The did my mother's when she was 36 because she would hemmhorage (sp?) and her cramps were debilitating. My cycle is tolerable- as long as I'm exercising regularly, keep my weight in the green zone and see a chiropractor regularly. I get pain in my back similar to back labor.
Good luck!!
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