We drove past hospice today. I find myself avoiding that street, that intersection. And when I do drive past it, I find myself looking away. I think I looked once. His favorite grocery store is right across the street from it. He used to drive out of his way just to go to that Fry's. I remember going shopping there with him so many times. I can still see him parking the car, getting out, walking into the store with me. I always liked that Fry's. I remember once when I was little, maybe like 10, I was really sick, and he drove all the way there to get me some pizza, cause I liked their pizza. I have a hard time going there now.

A few minutes ago "Hate Me" came on the radio here at work. I'm not feeling very welcome at my mom's house right now. And the words hit me all over again. I know she is helping me out right now, but I thought I was helping her too. I thought the kids, and having people around made her feel better. She even said that last week. But now I don't feel like she wants us around. I feel really alone. I miss Royce. I miss my house.

And I still can't believe he is gone. Its weird, it seems like I have a very delayed reaction. Its been nearly 2 months, and it seems like its just hitting me.

Ryan told me last night that he wishes Bob could come back.

Teary at work. Not a good thing.

I miss my dad.