So today we officially got approved for the apartment that we wanted so badly. This apartment is like a dream to us, thats kinda why I didn't really write about it, among other things, for fear that they would turn us down. Its one of those luxury apartments (since when did luxury and Barb ever get mentioned in the same sentence? This is a first), it is beautiful, it is on a hill overlooking Prescott Valley with nothing next to it on any side - just mountain, very isolated, except for a car dealership a little ways away. I was so scared we wouldn't get it. And now we are officially approved, and said we should move in by the 15th. OMG, things are moving so fast. ( It has a fireplace in it too, I'm so excited). The kids really didn't want to move, but after they saw the inside of the apartment they were a little more ok with it, they have never lived anywhere that nice. Just visited friends with houses that nice. I know they will have a hard time moving, but I know that this is a better place for them. I keep envisioning our little family (ok, I know, its not so little, humor me) inside, living there, watching tv, waking up in the morning, eating dinner. I just envision such peace. I want this so bad for my family, and I can't believe we are actually moving there. I officially got the job, start date the 17th. And I still can't believe Countrywide approved my refinancing loan and we've signed the papers already. We DO NOT have good credit. I can't believe people are giving us a chance. And the kids are excited about buying new stuff from Ikea for their new home. New stuff for their rooms. I can't wait till we are there, on a cold wet rainy cloudy day, fireplace going, watching a movie. I'm so excited. I think this is a whole new beginning for us. A place that Royce and I created, not my old one. Its just so fast, so fast. My mom is the only one not ok with us moving. She thinks the kids will starve and have no one to take care of them. I can't believe her, I so need to get away from her. She is just losing control and doesn't like it. She has no faith in my ability to raise my kids, or do anything else for that matter. I'll drive so fucking far away. Far far away. I love my mom, of course I do, but I need to get away from her. Even Kirk is ok with it, according to the kids. I'm sure he knows that is a better place for his children. He has been unhappy with our neighbors forever. Wanted the kids away from them. And they will probably see him just as often as they do now.

My thoughts keep going back to that back road we ended up going down by accident, where we would like to buy a house eventually. When we were driving that day I said to Royce, "This is where I want to live."

It was 68 degrees in Prescott tonight. It was at least 100 here - way after dark. Yeah.

Can I just say how much I love Ikea?

Thank you Heather for offering to help us move. I may just take you up on it. Even if I don't, I want you to come visit us. I'm so happy for you right now. Thanks for the picture - it is so sweet. And you are so beautiful in it, you look so good, I'm so jealous. I'm so happy that you are happy. And he is so cute - I can just see you guys on his Harley. Ok - jealous again. Someday we will all ride together, I know it. You deserve all that you have right now. I miss you too. Hope I see you at work.

I love that new song by Jet. I didn't even realize it was them singing it. I love it, I listen to it over and over, it gets stuck in my head. Its in my voice range, and it can be played on the piano, probabaly part of the reason I like it. Its just so singable. I love it. I love the words too. The name of the song is "Look What You've Done", but I thought the words were Fool of Everyone, or something like that. (Kind like I always think Bon Jovi shoulda called it "Shot Through the Heart" instead of "You Give Love a Bad Name). Does anyone else like this song, the Jet one?

I'm so excited.