I haven't been on for awhile cause I was sick. I spent a night in the cardiac intensive care. It really wasn't as serious as ICU, I was supposed to be on telemetry, but there wasn't a bed, so they put me in CICU. Yes, I am ok. I got sick, had chest pain AGAIN, went to the emergency department, had three abnormal ekgs ( flattened t wave segment for those cardiac people who actually understand all that stuff), which could have meant that I have had an ischemic incident at some point. In regular language, I could possibly have some dead cardiac tissue and am having some pain because of it. My cardiac enzymes were all normal though, which is good. So I got to be on a monitor for 24 hours and had the great pleasure of experiencing an adenosine stress test. Not something I would recommend. I personally would pick my yearly pap over it. You feel like you are dying, impending doom for 6 minutes. Lots of fun. And not the fun kind of doom. And I am on much closer levels of intimacy with people I know at the hospital, mainly George in EKG. You get felt up alot when they are doing 12 lead ekgs. Boobs are just so in the way. Especially big ones like mine. Nothing is sacred. He could have at least bought me dinner first. I felt so bad though that I didn't even care. Good news is, the stress test came back ok. And my lovely friends in L and D made me a spa package - a decorated peri bottle, "slippers" made from maxis, and a thong cut out of those sexy white fishnets we give people after they have a baby, all tucked in a bedpad signed by everyone. I feel the love.

On the whole boobs being in the way note, here's a good one for you all ( And you wonder why I don't like doctors). While I was laying in a phenergan/morphine coma in the ER, an internal medicine doctor had to pay me a visit because they had to consult him. This was like after 3 ekgs. So he appears at my bedside, I see him through the morphine fog, and he proceeds to tell me, very uncomfortably,

(brace yourself now) -------

" Now, umm, I don't think this is anything to worry about, umm, not anything dangerous, ummm, well, because, well - not to be offensive or anything, but ummm, ............... you do have ( insert uncomfortable pause) rather large breasts."
And proceeded to tell me that somehow my large ta-tas could interfere with the read out of the test. And apparently that is all he could come up with as to why it was abnormal. And this wasn't even anyone who actually saw my naked breasts while doing the ekg. Apparently he could visibly see the evidence through my hospital gown while laying down.

I wanted to look at him and say, "OH MY GOD !!!!! Why didn't someone ever tell me my boobs were big?!!! I had no idea !
Thank you doctor, thank you so much for telling me."

There ya go, my diagnosis. HUGE TITS.

Lovely.

(Why is the Doogie Howser themesong playing in my head?)

So ANYHOO..................I'm ok. I've got negative cardiac enzymes, a negative stress test, a urinary tract infection that I didn't know I had (I wonder if my big boobs caused that too?), a few days off to take it easy and a prescription of Percocet.

It's all good.

On a serious note, I'm going to continue my vegetarian, organic healthy diet, only be more strict about it, and continue to get serious about exercise. I need to lose about 50 pounds. Maybe 60. Not just to look good. To live.

My thoughts are with my friend Loida tonight, whose father had a heart attack this afternoon. He had emergency triple bypass surgery tonight. I haven't found out how things went. So please direct your thoughts and prayers, whoever or whatever you pray to, to be about her father. I hope everything is ok.

On that note, here's to good food, good exersize, good wine, good sex, and a good life.

Peace

PS. I started my MySpace. You can go it at www.myspace.com/barbsinnerspace

Tell me what you think. I can be a little more creative there. Would it be ok if I move my blog there? Or should I stay here? I love the music option. Tell me what you all think.

Peace