Hey Heather,
My MySpace is http://www.myspace.com/barbsinnerspace
I left a comment on your blog to and left it there too. Do you have one now?
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
Luna
Two days ago was the Full Moon. And it was splendid. Beautiful.
For about a week I had been planning to do a spell this night, July 18th, for my house. I have been behind on my mortgage payment for a long time. Every since I quit County. Nine months to be exact. Yeah.
I desperately wanted to keep my house, but had gotten so far above my head I didn't know what to do. Last week I spoke with my mortgage people, who were surprisingly extremely nice, especially considering the circumstances and my delinquance. And they were encouraging me to apply for a loan modification. Where they put what you owe ($12,000.00 in my case) at the back of the loan and catch you up. Basically a miracle. I had tried this about November and found out I didn't qualify for it in about March. But now they were encouraging me to apply for it again.
I agreed. Was supposed to fax in some info, a letter of explanation, etc, etc, etc.
I thought I should do my spell first.
So Wednesday night, I went out in the yard, in full view of the Moon. And it was a spectacular sight. She was beautiful. Every time I have planned on a spell on the Full Moon, or a ritual, I often try and talk myself out of it, because I'm tired usually, but then when I see her I am so taken back by what I see in the sky that I can't help myself.
So I decided to do it. I made the spell up myself. Cast my circle. I can't really talk about it here, but I did everything the right way. It was a simple spell. With good intention, but a little lacking in faith and emotion. I did it anyhow. And did it right. And, once again, just let the magick "sit". Let it settle. Did it and then didn't worry about it.
I am learning not to doubt what I know in my heart.
I had work today, went out with a co-worker for a couple of drinks who needed to talk, and then she took me home. When I got home there was a Fed Ex envelope under my doormat. I opened it and it was a letter from my mortgage company telling me my loan modification had been approved, and all the documents needed were enclosed, all I had to do was sign them, notorize them, return them, and send a payment.
I'm in awe. Less than 48 hours later.
Thank you Spirit. Thank you Goddess.
Blessed Be.
For about a week I had been planning to do a spell this night, July 18th, for my house. I have been behind on my mortgage payment for a long time. Every since I quit County. Nine months to be exact. Yeah.
I desperately wanted to keep my house, but had gotten so far above my head I didn't know what to do. Last week I spoke with my mortgage people, who were surprisingly extremely nice, especially considering the circumstances and my delinquance. And they were encouraging me to apply for a loan modification. Where they put what you owe ($12,000.00 in my case) at the back of the loan and catch you up. Basically a miracle. I had tried this about November and found out I didn't qualify for it in about March. But now they were encouraging me to apply for it again.
I agreed. Was supposed to fax in some info, a letter of explanation, etc, etc, etc.
I thought I should do my spell first.
So Wednesday night, I went out in the yard, in full view of the Moon. And it was a spectacular sight. She was beautiful. Every time I have planned on a spell on the Full Moon, or a ritual, I often try and talk myself out of it, because I'm tired usually, but then when I see her I am so taken back by what I see in the sky that I can't help myself.
So I decided to do it. I made the spell up myself. Cast my circle. I can't really talk about it here, but I did everything the right way. It was a simple spell. With good intention, but a little lacking in faith and emotion. I did it anyhow. And did it right. And, once again, just let the magick "sit". Let it settle. Did it and then didn't worry about it.
I am learning not to doubt what I know in my heart.
I had work today, went out with a co-worker for a couple of drinks who needed to talk, and then she took me home. When I got home there was a Fed Ex envelope under my doormat. I opened it and it was a letter from my mortgage company telling me my loan modification had been approved, and all the documents needed were enclosed, all I had to do was sign them, notorize them, return them, and send a payment.
I'm in awe. Less than 48 hours later.
Thank you Spirit. Thank you Goddess.
Blessed Be.
Footnote: (Good energy in my whole periphery apparently)
Tyler has always been very skeptical of my beliefs. Even mocking them. I told him this evening what happened with the house and my spell. He has been looking for a job for about 6 months with no success. I swear I have driven him everywhere and back, him putting in at least 100 applications, everywhere from the theater to every fast food place around here, to no avail. No success. Tonight (after I talked to him about the spell and the Moon) he walked down to an indoor go-cart racing place, without me knowing. He told me he put his application in there, the guy interviewed him right there, said they needed lots of people, would hire him for sure, and that they would start him at $9.00 an hour. And its half a mile from the house.
Weird Energy Footnote:
On the way walking back home he told me a little piece of paper fell from the sky in front of him. It was the paper "fortune" from a fortune cookie. He picked it up. And I quote: "LUCK WILL VISIT YOU ON THE NEXT FULL MOON."
I swear on my Dad's grave. Unfuckingbelievable. I'm not making this up.
He's keeping it in his wallet. July 18th. We'll see.
Tomorrow is Summer Solstice. I will be celebrating.
Blessed Be.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Worked 10 hours today, 4:45 am until 3:15 pm, learning to set up the dialysis machine. It is very complicated, but I'm finally getting it. It's amazing that anyone ever came up with the ability to create a machine that does that. I never knew how amazing dialysis was. My patients in the hospital would just leave for a few hours, come back, and that would be that. I had no idea. Or how dangerous it is. If one little thing isn't programmed right, or is set up wrong, someone dies in moments. They told us about a patient a few years ago whose access needles in his fistula came out while he was sleeping in the chair being dialyzed. No one knew the needles came out because he had been cold and was completely covered up with 2 blankets. The machine kept pulling blood out and pumped his blood at a liter a minute into his blankets. He bled out and died in about a minute and a half. I had no idea.
I always loved OB. Everything about it. I thought it was the only thing I could be passionate about. I never thought I would love this and find it fascinating. I really am loving my job. I don't dread going. I love what I'm learning. I love the patients. I love my job again. You have no idea how that feels. I thought I was stuck being miserable for the rest of my life. I hated my job just a few short weeks ago. I can't even describe it.
Between leaving the religion I was in, and leaving County, I have found a new peace and love for life and who I am. I just realized the combined effect of both of those things. I feel like a whole new and different person.
I rode the bus today. In 118 degree heat. And instead of being pissed, and irritated, and feeling sorry for myself for not having a second car, and being irritated with all those "nasty" people on the bus - it did something different to me. I felt so fortunate. The little kids who have to wait in the heat and ride the bus, the poor, the sick, the people in wheelchairs. And how they must feel when the whole entire bus load of people is irritated at them and wishing they weren't there because it takes so long to get them situated on the bus. How they must feel. And some of them most likely Vets who lost their legs in war time. I have legs. I have freedom.
The bus is full of throw away people. And today I didn't see them that way. This is the kind of change that is happening to me.
And I think Royce is going to be hired by the same company as a Dialysis Tech at a different clinic. He will be so good at this. Patients will love him. He will make more money, and we will have better hours and get to see each other more. Every night.
I actually have every night to see my kids. Like I did today. And will tomorrow. And every other day of my life.
The getting up at 3 am to be there at 4:45 is the only part that is killing me.
I actually want to go to work tomorrow though. Yeah me!!!
I always loved OB. Everything about it. I thought it was the only thing I could be passionate about. I never thought I would love this and find it fascinating. I really am loving my job. I don't dread going. I love what I'm learning. I love the patients. I love my job again. You have no idea how that feels. I thought I was stuck being miserable for the rest of my life. I hated my job just a few short weeks ago. I can't even describe it.
Between leaving the religion I was in, and leaving County, I have found a new peace and love for life and who I am. I just realized the combined effect of both of those things. I feel like a whole new and different person.
I rode the bus today. In 118 degree heat. And instead of being pissed, and irritated, and feeling sorry for myself for not having a second car, and being irritated with all those "nasty" people on the bus - it did something different to me. I felt so fortunate. The little kids who have to wait in the heat and ride the bus, the poor, the sick, the people in wheelchairs. And how they must feel when the whole entire bus load of people is irritated at them and wishing they weren't there because it takes so long to get them situated on the bus. How they must feel. And some of them most likely Vets who lost their legs in war time. I have legs. I have freedom.
The bus is full of throw away people. And today I didn't see them that way. This is the kind of change that is happening to me.
And I think Royce is going to be hired by the same company as a Dialysis Tech at a different clinic. He will be so good at this. Patients will love him. He will make more money, and we will have better hours and get to see each other more. Every night.
I actually have every night to see my kids. Like I did today. And will tomorrow. And every other day of my life.
The getting up at 3 am to be there at 4:45 is the only part that is killing me.
I actually want to go to work tomorrow though. Yeah me!!!
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Last night was a very sad, lonely night for me. One of those nights where you know afterward that things have to change, where things can't keep going the way they are. I am choosing for today to be the beginning of that change. I am choosing for last night to be the end of that bad year and a half. I am choosing this. The left-over vibrations from last night are still in the house, but it already feels more peaceful.
I called my mom today. I told her I didn't want to fight, that I was sorry for my behaviour in the last year and a half, that things would be different from now on and that I wanted things to be better between her and me. She told me she doesn't care about anything anymore, she doesn't want to hear about any trouble I may be having, she is done speaking to me, and that our relationship is over. Forvever. And that she didn't even understand why we were having this conversation. She's done. That she loves me, but she is done.
I guess thats that. I probably deserve that. But it hurts more than I expected it to. I feel very abandoned by her. She said she doesn't understand why I even care about how we get along. I said, well, you are my mother. And she said "No, not really."
Okay. I get it.
I feel like my circle of people has diminished significantly. That there really is no one outside my family anymore. I guess this means I should treat my family like gold, like they are all that I have. Cause they are.
I called my mom today. I told her I didn't want to fight, that I was sorry for my behaviour in the last year and a half, that things would be different from now on and that I wanted things to be better between her and me. She told me she doesn't care about anything anymore, she doesn't want to hear about any trouble I may be having, she is done speaking to me, and that our relationship is over. Forvever. And that she didn't even understand why we were having this conversation. She's done. That she loves me, but she is done.
I guess thats that. I probably deserve that. But it hurts more than I expected it to. I feel very abandoned by her. She said she doesn't understand why I even care about how we get along. I said, well, you are my mother. And she said "No, not really."
Okay. I get it.
I feel like my circle of people has diminished significantly. That there really is no one outside my family anymore. I guess this means I should treat my family like gold, like they are all that I have. Cause they are.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Sunday Morning
Transitioning from sleep to consciousness to the cat meowing as my alarm - much better than my cell phone alarm. And going back to sleep. Waking up with the dog against my belly, my six year old at my feet, my 4 year old unconscious against my back inbetween Royce and me, Royce on the far side of the bed sleeping peacefully on Father's Day morning, and the cat curled up at the foot of the bed. Its a good way to wake up. Especially on Father's Day.
(Daddy's Little Girl - look at my little gloves. Must have been Sabbath. I love this picture.)
I haven't had a sense of Sunday morning for a long time. The only time I talk about my past experiences with church its always about the Adventist church. But from ages 14 till 28 I attended a Baptist church every Sunday morning. I probably don't associate that church or people with "religion". They were family, and it was beautiful. And I miss them very much. But there was a sense of rest, of peace, of worship, of spirituality. Every Sunday morning. Which was always a refreshment after the day before. I woke up this morning and realized this is my church. My home. It is where I worship, it is my spiritual place. It is my Sacred Place. I need to keep this in mind. And now, with my new job, I will always have Sunday mornings. They are back.
(Walking me down the aisle, 1991)
Lately I have not been focused on my beliefs very well. I have let life get in the way. And I should be old enough to realize that when you let life get in the way of who you are and what you believe, then life suffers and doesn't go very well. I don't know why this has been hard for me to remember lately. So I need to get back to basics.
(Reading his Bible. In the house he built. Something he did every night. 1968ish.)
I did something stupid on Friday night, that led to more stupid things. Etc. etc. etc. So Friday night wasn't a good night. But it has made me reevaluate some things in my life. So, I will walk away from it at least mindful of things I need to change. Not just feeling bad and guilty. There are some changes that need to be made.
(Helping Tyler play my old piano. Wish he could see Tyler play now.)
I need to go see my dad today. I think the last time I saw him was on the anniversary of his death, September 8. I didn't go Thanksgiving, or Christmas, or his birthday. I'm not sure why. He has been on my mind lately. So I need to do that today. And will take Royce somewhere to eat, and let him have a nice relaxing day.
(Right before he got really sick)
I've led a pretty destructive life since my dad died. It has been on a down hill slide since then, at my choice. Alcohol, finances, family, time management, physically, sexually, spiritually, healthwise, job-wise. I think I'm finally coming out of it. I pulled Anne's badge out of my wallet the other day - over alcohol of course. And I started thinking again about what she looks like now. Its been almost 6 years. Bones? Skin? What level of decomposition? And her baby, where is it? In her arms? It would have fit in her hand. And what does it look like? Tissue? Bones? Eyes open? I guess they wouldn't be, she was only 20 weeks. I wonder if they dressed the baby. I forget what she named her. It says on her tombstone. And if anyone has any unresolved issues when they died, any reason to stay around, it is Anne. But I haven't felt her. It certainly wouldn't surprise me. I almost expect it. She was so beautiful.
(Grampa with Lauren and Cheyenne)
And I still wonder all these things about my dad. What does he look like now? I can still see his church suit that we burried him in. And what his face looked like at that point. And his big cold cold stiff pale white hands folded over his body. It didn't even feel human. Does he still look like that? Does he still have skin? Or does his face look like one of those half dead demon things in horror movies? Royce said he still has skin, because he was embalmed. Its still hard for me to believe that at the cemetary he is actually under there, 6 feet down. That its actully him laying under there. I didn't expect Father's Day to affect me like this. His birthday came and went June 4, and nothing like this.
I miss you Dad.
I'm going to get back to who I am Dad. I promise. I know you would want me to.
Happy Father's Day.
This is my favorite picture of him. On Camelback Mountain. 1985.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
You're Either On The Bus, .....Or Off The Bus
So I've finished 3 days of work this week and have one more tomorrow. It has all been classroom so far. And I love it. Every night when I come home I'm tired, but I have this sense of loving my job. My god, I never thought I would have that again. I'm actually excited to get into my clinic and start working. That will start in September. Tomorrow we do get to start working on the machines though.
And I am rapidly becoming a non-slave to gas prices. I have started taking the bus. Its for more of a reason than we just have one car. I really am rebelling against the gas prices, it is ridiculous. I'm quite a ways away during training, but I don't even care. I feel really strongly about the environment, and if thats true then I need to walk the walk. Or ride the ride so to speak. And I don't have to fight traffic, or worry about tickets, or accidents, or whatever. I really don't mind. And I feel good about it. I think I'm going to quit driving all together.
So today totally sucked for my diet. Had little money for lunch, so bought cheaply and ended up at Taco Hell. Wow, forgot how bad that food really is. So I've been in carb overload all day. And then I said what the fuck as long as I'm being bad I might as well be really bad, and had a couple candy bars. I hate myself. Start over tomorrow I guess. I can barely even look in the morror. At least my boobs still look good. I am getting really furstrated though. I need to work out tonight.
And I am rapidly becoming a non-slave to gas prices. I have started taking the bus. Its for more of a reason than we just have one car. I really am rebelling against the gas prices, it is ridiculous. I'm quite a ways away during training, but I don't even care. I feel really strongly about the environment, and if thats true then I need to walk the walk. Or ride the ride so to speak. And I don't have to fight traffic, or worry about tickets, or accidents, or whatever. I really don't mind. And I feel good about it. I think I'm going to quit driving all together.
So today totally sucked for my diet. Had little money for lunch, so bought cheaply and ended up at Taco Hell. Wow, forgot how bad that food really is. So I've been in carb overload all day. And then I said what the fuck as long as I'm being bad I might as well be really bad, and had a couple candy bars. I hate myself. Start over tomorrow I guess. I can barely even look in the morror. At least my boobs still look good. I am getting really furstrated though. I need to work out tonight.
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Jetplane
Tyler and I recorded "Leaving on a Jetplane" tonight. Me singing and him on the guitar. And with all of his electronic magic put it on MySpace for me.
If you'd like to hear it go to this MySpace and go to the very last song ( box on the right ) that says "Leaving On A Jetplane."
http://www.myspace.com/illegaluploads
(Don't worry, "illegaluploads" is just what Tyler named it. You won't get in trouble)
Or you can just go to my MySpace, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=68417136
I picked it as my song.
I was quite pleased with how it turned out.
If you'd like to hear it go to this MySpace and go to the very last song ( box on the right ) that says "Leaving On A Jetplane."
http://www.myspace.com/illegaluploads
(Don't worry, "illegaluploads" is just what Tyler named it. You won't get in trouble)
Or you can just go to my MySpace, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=68417136
I picked it as my song.
I was quite pleased with how it turned out.
So I just finished my first week of my new job - and I love it. LOVE IT. Had 3 days of classroom and then 2 days at the actual clinic for observation. I love the patients. They are all so nice. And so appreciative. All of the staff I will be working with is not only nice, but fun. Lots of joking and laughing, even with the patients. And last but not least the management is also great. I'm waiting for the next shoe to drop - and its not. I still can't believe I work there. I actually like my job again.
Last night when I dropped Royce off at work after he brought me the car I ran into Tina who I used to work with. She was on her way up to Labor and Delivery, my old unit, and asked me to come up for a few minutes to exchange phone numbers and see everyone. So I went up with her, walked into the locker room with her, and ran into lots of friends. It was great to see everyone. They all asked me about my new job, and I told them I was really happy and how great it was, and commented on how even the management was great. Kelly leans over and says to me, laughing, "Well, just don't tell your new boss she has a fat ass" referring to one of my last comments to Maria. I said, "I just call it like I see it." Also ran in to Liz in the locker room, which surprised the hell out of her. She is Maria's little drone who cost me getting hired there a couple of months ago (blessin in disguise, so I should probably thank her). She saw me walk in for my registry shift, and the next thing I know my new manager calls me up and tells me Maria came to him and he can't hire me. In the locker room yesterday she just kind of looked at me and said "Well hello", and I said (not unlike Jack Nicholson in the shining when he says Heeeeere's Johnny.....) "I"m back - didn't you hear?" And the look on her face was priceless. She said, "Really?????????" And I said, while scoffing, "No, not really." It was great. On my way out I hadn't said goodbye to Robin, and needed to come back into the unit to do so. At the big triage window I saw Liz in triage and asked her if she could buzz me back into the unit so I could say goodbye to Robin. She mumbled something from the other room, and just looked at me, then looked away. So I repeated myself. She looked straight at me and said, "No, I can't help you Barb. I can't help you." I really thought she was kidding and said "Are you serious?" She said "Yes, I can't help you." And looked away completely ignoring me. I'm thinking she heard the fat ass comment. I'm still laughing about this. OMG what a bitch. And when you look like her you should at least have a personality - really. So I waited and Robin came up and I got to talk to her. Before I left, when both Liz and Robin had stepped away, I left Liz a little note. "Liz, Maria won't be here forever." And a big smiley face. Hee hee. Please - like I would come back now even if she was gone, but Liz doesn't have to know that. I got a huge kick out of the whole thing.
I've gotten back in contact with an old high school friend, Andrew. Which is really nice. Talked to Kim who told me she would help me try to get our class together for a get together at our reunion. She knows everyone. What they are doing. Where they are at. She always did. And she looks really really good. She said we should start a Class of 89 MySpace and try to contact people that way. Sounds like a good idea. I will start working on that. If anyone out there knows anyone from my class and where they are please give me a heads up. Its not like we had a huge class.
Between my class reunion coming up and some recent things in my personal life I'm getting obsessive about my weight. Its just unacceptable to me. I started low carb about 2 weeks ago, slipped up a little for a few days, but am back on it for the last 3 days. And its working. Like always. I've started exercizing again and working out, I'm taking water pills, doing the no carb, and totally restricting my calories. If I don't fuck up my relationship with food and my feelings about it, I know I won't do this. I just have to get used to being hungry. Trying to eat only once a day. Just enough to make this no carb thing work. I know I've started and stopped so many times thinking that that time will be "the" time. And failed. But there are some aspects to this time that I just don't think I'm going to get over. Its really messing with my head. Bad. I am determined to do anything and everything it takes, no exceptions, to lose this weight and look the way I need to look. I have to change my whole mental state to do it though. Its becoming my first and only priority. It has to be something I'm always thinking about, on some level, or I know I will become complacent and fuck up. I can't do that. Not this time.
Bought a pool for the kids for the back yard today. Its so cool. They are out playing in it now. It really is so cool. Big - 10 feet across and about 3 feet deep. Awesome.
Michele, if you are reading this - I'm really glad we got to meet. I know we will stay friends. I know the other day was rough. But things are totally better now. I would love to keep "hanging" out, on a regular basis. If you know what I mean. We'll talk. I'll probably call you tonight, if thats ok.
Last night when I dropped Royce off at work after he brought me the car I ran into Tina who I used to work with. She was on her way up to Labor and Delivery, my old unit, and asked me to come up for a few minutes to exchange phone numbers and see everyone. So I went up with her, walked into the locker room with her, and ran into lots of friends. It was great to see everyone. They all asked me about my new job, and I told them I was really happy and how great it was, and commented on how even the management was great. Kelly leans over and says to me, laughing, "Well, just don't tell your new boss she has a fat ass" referring to one of my last comments to Maria. I said, "I just call it like I see it." Also ran in to Liz in the locker room, which surprised the hell out of her. She is Maria's little drone who cost me getting hired there a couple of months ago (blessin in disguise, so I should probably thank her). She saw me walk in for my registry shift, and the next thing I know my new manager calls me up and tells me Maria came to him and he can't hire me. In the locker room yesterday she just kind of looked at me and said "Well hello", and I said (not unlike Jack Nicholson in the shining when he says Heeeeere's Johnny.....) "I"m back - didn't you hear?" And the look on her face was priceless. She said, "Really?????????" And I said, while scoffing, "No, not really." It was great. On my way out I hadn't said goodbye to Robin, and needed to come back into the unit to do so. At the big triage window I saw Liz in triage and asked her if she could buzz me back into the unit so I could say goodbye to Robin. She mumbled something from the other room, and just looked at me, then looked away. So I repeated myself. She looked straight at me and said, "No, I can't help you Barb. I can't help you." I really thought she was kidding and said "Are you serious?" She said "Yes, I can't help you." And looked away completely ignoring me. I'm thinking she heard the fat ass comment. I'm still laughing about this. OMG what a bitch. And when you look like her you should at least have a personality - really. So I waited and Robin came up and I got to talk to her. Before I left, when both Liz and Robin had stepped away, I left Liz a little note. "Liz, Maria won't be here forever." And a big smiley face. Hee hee. Please - like I would come back now even if she was gone, but Liz doesn't have to know that. I got a huge kick out of the whole thing.
I've gotten back in contact with an old high school friend, Andrew. Which is really nice. Talked to Kim who told me she would help me try to get our class together for a get together at our reunion. She knows everyone. What they are doing. Where they are at. She always did. And she looks really really good. She said we should start a Class of 89 MySpace and try to contact people that way. Sounds like a good idea. I will start working on that. If anyone out there knows anyone from my class and where they are please give me a heads up. Its not like we had a huge class.
Between my class reunion coming up and some recent things in my personal life I'm getting obsessive about my weight. Its just unacceptable to me. I started low carb about 2 weeks ago, slipped up a little for a few days, but am back on it for the last 3 days. And its working. Like always. I've started exercizing again and working out, I'm taking water pills, doing the no carb, and totally restricting my calories. If I don't fuck up my relationship with food and my feelings about it, I know I won't do this. I just have to get used to being hungry. Trying to eat only once a day. Just enough to make this no carb thing work. I know I've started and stopped so many times thinking that that time will be "the" time. And failed. But there are some aspects to this time that I just don't think I'm going to get over. Its really messing with my head. Bad. I am determined to do anything and everything it takes, no exceptions, to lose this weight and look the way I need to look. I have to change my whole mental state to do it though. Its becoming my first and only priority. It has to be something I'm always thinking about, on some level, or I know I will become complacent and fuck up. I can't do that. Not this time.
Bought a pool for the kids for the back yard today. Its so cool. They are out playing in it now. It really is so cool. Big - 10 feet across and about 3 feet deep. Awesome.
Michele, if you are reading this - I'm really glad we got to meet. I know we will stay friends. I know the other day was rough. But things are totally better now. I would love to keep "hanging" out, on a regular basis. If you know what I mean. We'll talk. I'll probably call you tonight, if thats ok.
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Blue Monday
Working at St. Joe's tonight. Its so nice to be this close to home. And quite frankly, in a "real" hospital. Its just so huge though.
I actually am starting my dialysis job on Monday, can you even believe it? I went to sign ner-hire paperwork, and Carrie (my new boss) told me I could start Monday if I wanted to. Hell yes I want to start Monday. We were waiting on my background check to come back and she lied a little and told them it had. We seem to have hit it off already very well. And her assistant is Heather - and we hit it off famously too. This is like a dream come true. It seems like she really wants me there. It feels good. I remember what that used to feel like.
Fuck Maria.
Stacey - I got your letter today. I'm so keeping it forever. I'm really glad we are friends too.
Nikki - I emailed Kevin. And I want to talk to you about planning a get together for our class for April. Lets do it - music, party, everything. And oh my god, I found pictures on MySpace of the class of 88's reunion - you are going to die. Literally. We'll talk. And we have LOTS of other stuff to talk about. June is going to be a very interesting month around here.
Thanks everyone for the congrats. It feels really good.
I actually am starting my dialysis job on Monday, can you even believe it? I went to sign ner-hire paperwork, and Carrie (my new boss) told me I could start Monday if I wanted to. Hell yes I want to start Monday. We were waiting on my background check to come back and she lied a little and told them it had. We seem to have hit it off already very well. And her assistant is Heather - and we hit it off famously too. This is like a dream come true. It seems like she really wants me there. It feels good. I remember what that used to feel like.
Fuck Maria.
Stacey - I got your letter today. I'm so keeping it forever. I'm really glad we are friends too.
Nikki - I emailed Kevin. And I want to talk to you about planning a get together for our class for April. Lets do it - music, party, everything. And oh my god, I found pictures on MySpace of the class of 88's reunion - you are going to die. Literally. We'll talk. And we have LOTS of other stuff to talk about. June is going to be a very interesting month around here.
Thanks everyone for the congrats. It feels really good.
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